Saturday, January 28, 2012


I've always been a dreamer. Well, I think most people are. I just have an odd tendency to remember them. My old roommates and now my husband must have gotten sick of listening to me babble each morning. I find if I talk about it right when I wake up, I remember it with more clarity, however I don't ever do anything with them; I don't keep a dream journal. Now, with husband gone and old roommates in different time zones or schedules, I haven't taken note of anything crazy. Until two weeks ago.

{My new favorite song and album}

So I had a dream. The most vivid dream I've ever had. The clearest dream I've ever had. And the most emotionally powerful dream I've ever had.

The northern lights were gorgeous. In my real non-dream life, I have seen the northern lights 2 times. Nothing could compare to what I saw in the dream. They were the most vibrant color of green I could ever imagine. And the "northern" lights were happening right here in San Diego. I was the first person to notice, and I happened to be in a very large field, almost like an old farmland. More and more people were gathering to watch this amazing feat of the sky. The green colors were the most vibrant colors I have ever seen, in a dream or real life. The flowing and ever moving green streaks were getting brighter. A lightening and electric storm was coming through. No rain, just beautiful bolts of brightness, lighting the green even more. This beauty went on for a while, and slowly died off. Eventually their were airplanes. Big jets. They apparently had been circling and couldn't be in the area, much less land because of the lightening. All of a sudden, their lights are flashing and going out. They are making horrible noises. They were clearly affected by the storm. None of them have landing gear out. And all of a sudden, one by one, they come crashing down on their bellies at a very high speed. People are scattering like mad. I started running the wrong way. I looked up. And a plane was coming straight for me. It hit me. And nothing hurt. All of a sudden everything went white. Like super clear and beautiful white. And I woke up.

I woke up with a renewed sense of happiness. I was content. And then I remembered what just happened. And I was super freaked out. I have never died in my dreams.

So I did some research. Northern lights in dreams:

To see the northern lights in your dream represent renewed energy, vitality, awe, insight and youth.  A situation or relationship will be made clear to you or a positive spiritual experience will fill you with warmth and love. You will gain some amazing new wisdom and knowledge. Alternatively, the dream indicates that you know what you need to do, but may be too lazy or too afraid to jump into action. 

Couldn't be more true. And death:

To dream that you die in your dream symbolizes inner changes, transformation, self-discovery and positive development that is happening within you or your life. You are undergoing a transitional phase and are becoming more enlightened or spiritual. Although such a dream may bring about feelings of fear and anxiety, it is no cause for alarm as it is often considered a positive symbol.  Dreams of experiencing your own death usually means that big changes are ahead for you. You are moving on to new beginnings and leaving the past behind. These changes does not necessarily imply a negative turn of events. Metaphorically, dying can be seen as an end or a termination to your old ways and habits. So, dying does not always mean a physical death, but an ending of something.


Having a husband deployed is only something that you can totally understand and grasp if it is something that you have gone through personally. No one can prepare you for this. I'm not trying to say it's so horrible and bad and everyone please feel sorry for me. No, that's not it at all. I'm actually making the most of this "alone" time [although I rarely feel "alone"]. I have been making some personal internal changes that I'm starting to feel really good about. More on that down the road. We are 1/3 of the way through this deployment [with the current "schedules", however who really knows?] but I still feel our love growing.

OKAY! Enough with the sappiness. Training blog. Back to dreaming. I have some dream achievements for this Panama experience. Dreams aren't supposed to be set low, because when reaching a dream, the reward is that much greater. So there are goals and dreams. And I suppose some expectations. All of which will be in my back pocket on race day. 

Carlsbad race report and training update soon to come. Leaving with this shot of beautiful San Diego. On the top of Mt. Soledad today with Noko and Ian. Soooo clear. So warm. SO amazing. Thank you Kyle for doing what you do so I can do this.

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