Saturday, July 11, 2015

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life

So why not "race" a sprint triathlon?! At the last minute working the expo today, I decided to toe the line tomorrow. Got my timing chip, bib number and swim cap {and all the other crap! you need for a triathlon} and I'm ready as I'll ever be to begin again.

{last year}
1) I'm 20lbs over weight
2) I've got maybe 15 run miles total since Superfrog last October. 
3) Kermit's odometer hasn't moved. {he did get a good bath the other week}
4) I've swam to the 1/4 mile buoy at the cove a handful of times. Slowly and for fun only. More like floating out there to clear my mind. 
5) I pulled my rib two weeks ago and it's been touch and go for taking deep breaths, swimming, living. {yes, dramatic}

1) Why not?
2) It's one of the perks of my job. {unpaid, but free}
3} I need to kickstart my body & heart:

It's been almost a year since I lost myself. Love is an odd and wonderful emotion. I feel like I only have so much to give. I know there are people out there with endless amounts. But most have a breaking point. I don't think I realized how hard Kyle's heart journey would be, and sometime after last July I stopped loving myself. I was {and still am} worried about him. His heart. His career. Our life together. And unfortunately, I lost sight of the present in looking towards an uncertain future. 

We listened to an interesting NPR podcast {TED radio hour, "Shifting Time"} on the way home from Phoenix about time. How there isn't a present, only a past and the future. What does being in the moment truly mean? 

I realized I've been looking towards an unknown future with a past that is empty. 

So it's time for a change. 

Ready or not, here I come, future. One stroke, revolution and step at a time.